Have you ever seen a fellow business owner share a huge success on social media and felt that green monster called jealousy bubbling up? Social media has made it so easy for us to compare our lives, families, mothering ability and businesses to others and often, we end up feeling like we aren’t measuring up. Everyone I know has experienced this feeling (and if you haven’t, your are either lying or kidding yourself). I’ve found these strategies helpful to avoid the comparison trap in business.


Know Your Mission

Last year, I got caught up feeling jealous of another business serving mom entrepreneurs.  I kept seeing their highly shared webinars of how they had six figure launches (and how you can too). They have carved out an amazing niche in the online course space. Earlier this year, I refined my mission which is to provide community-starved female entrepreneurs connection and education via inclusive events. Once I realized we have COMPLETELY different businesses, it helped me stop comparing my business success to theirs.  


Who Do You Serve

This ties directly into knowing your mission.  When you are clear on your mission, it makes it so much easier to identify who your customers are. While we serve mom business owners, I’ve surveyed and learned about my audience to get even more specific.  BAM’s ideal customer is an introverted mom entrepreneur that has a niche business.  We definitely have members that are outside of this profile (women without kids, direct sellers, extraverts) but when I know who my ideal customers are, it helps me pay attention to them and their needs, instead of worrying about the fans and customers of other businesses in my space.


Blinders On

Once you are clear on what your mission is and who your ideal customers are, you can slap those blinders on and get to work. The more you worry about what YOU do, and the less you worry about what OTHERS are doing, you’ll get more joy out of your business and feel less of the comparison trap.


Ask For Testimonials

If you are lucky enough to receive unsolicited praise from customers or clients, start a document where you keep them all in one place.  Print them out so you can see them on a regular basis.

If you haven’t received any, this is a great time to ask.  Would you like to see some positive reviews on your Facebook Page? Draft an email to your customers and make it easy for them to review your Facebook Page. Be sure to ask permission to use the review on your website too.

I love referring back to reviews and testimonials when I’m feeling low or I’ve found myself comparing myself too much to others.


Minimize Social Media

The people I know that spend the most time on social media, also seem to be the ones that struggle the most with the comparison trap. If you recognize that your feelings of value go down in direct relation to your social media use, get off it.  If you must post for your business, consider scheduling posts thru Facebook or a 3rd party app such as Cinchshare, RecurPost or Tailwind. Also consider scheduling small blocks of time to spend on social media and set a timer to remind you when your time is up.


Most of all, when I feel like I am falling down the comparison trap rabbit hole, I like to call a friend that will offer sound advice and build me back up.  Our Business Among Moms tribe is a great support system and we support each other and help us keep our focus.


How do you avoid the comparison trap?  We’d love to hear – please share in the comments.

Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterPin on PinterestShare on LinkedInShare on Google+Email this to someoneBuffer this page


  1. Thanks Julie for the post and reminder. I found I needed to adjust how I measure success since working part time on my own business. I realized I was trapped in comparing myself to the full time career folks on one side (making more than I do!), as well as to the full time moms on the other. Focusing on my mission in business and in family makes me realize I’m winning when I get to have fulfilling work with clients AND fulfilling adventures with my son – all the other indicators (income, lifestyle, pinterest worthiness of activities and snacks) just don’t really matter that much when you focus and get your blinders on.

  2. Excellent post, Julie!

    Regardless of age and maturity, I think most of us have fallen in this comparison trap. It also doesn’t help when one is somewhat competitive to begin with (as I was for years, but mellowed with age and experience). The social media/comparison issue inevitably arises with my coaching clients, and I advise them on some of the same point you do.

    You are right: It matters what WE are doing, not what others are doing! I am unique; others in my profession are unique. We bring our own stories, experiences, and skills to our clients. I think I am going to share your post on my FB business page… it is so timely and relevant, and perhaps BAM will gain a few new members!

    Thanks again for this rich post!

  3. Great post, Julie. Comparison is the thief of joy.

    Not only are your words true in business, but in the general mom world as well. The first year of motherhood is full of not only comparing yourself to other mothers, but the growth of your child, as well. And although it’s gotten better and you learn to surround yourself with those that provide support and encouragement, it’s still an easy trap to fall prey.

    In business, we truly grow when we lift others around us, and realize that celebrating other’s success does not diminish our own.

    Thank you for the reminder that we all thrive in our own ways, in our own time.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.